Golf Jokes

[plumber1965]

A male foursome is playing behind a female foursome. The ladies are playing slower and the guys catch up to them on the 6th tee. Three of the ladies get up and hit beautiful drives. the last ladiy get up and hits it 10 yards, she stomps up to her ball, swings and htits another 10 yards. this goes on for a couple more hits when the man says " hey lady you need to take some lessons." she replies "i took those fuckng lessons asshole" to which he says " mabye you should of taken golf lessons!" he didn't see it coming had no time to duck he was 42 RIP

Lets keep them coming guys!!!!

 

[Avvatar]

After his usual Saturday morning round of golf, a man's wow asks why he never plays with Tom O'Brien anymore.
"Would you want to play golf with a man who constantly cheats, lies about his score, and is a poor sport?" he replied.
"No." said the wife. "Of course not!"
"Well, neither does Tom O'Brien! "

 

[Dave]

A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.

The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize. She explained that she was a physical therapist: "Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd just allow me!" she told him earnestly.

"Ummph, oooh, nnooo, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes," he replied breathlessly as he remained in the fetal position still clasping his hands together at his crotch. But she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help him.

She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, she loosened his pants, and she put her hands inside. After a short massage she asked him, "How does that feel?"

To which he replied: "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell!"