bwhite220
Brandon | BotM Jan 2038
I had the honor of hearing one of the best short stories I've ever heard last night and I have to share it with you guys. Last night, I was hanging out with a bunch of guys at the local B&M and one of them says, "Hey, Jim. Did you tell Brandon about what happened this morning?"
Jim went outside on his back deck for his morning ritual of coffee and a pipe when he heard a very bizarre noise coming from around the side of his house. He decided to go take a look and heard something clawing midway up his fence but it was coming from the other side. Not sure what it was, he goes through his house, out the front door, and around the corner to see what is causing all the commotion.
And then he sees it.
It's a possum. Hanging by its nuts!
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! The theory is it climbed up the fence to get over it and on his way down, his testicles got caught between the fence boards rendering him useless. He couldn't climb up or down and was stuck!
Jim put a glove on was going to try and figure out how to release him but the possum being in pain kept trying to bite and claw at him. So he called Animal Control who came out with one of those sticks with a rope on the end and was able to get the possum off the fence. Supposedly, Animal Control took the possum to a Vet to have him looked over and then they will release him back "to the wild".
That possum won't be able to show his face around his buddies anymore though.
"Hey man, where were you yesterday? You didn't come hang out like normal."
"I don't want to talk about it..." he replied in a higher pitched voice with his head (and nuts) hung in shame.
Jim went outside on his back deck for his morning ritual of coffee and a pipe when he heard a very bizarre noise coming from around the side of his house. He decided to go take a look and heard something clawing midway up his fence but it was coming from the other side. Not sure what it was, he goes through his house, out the front door, and around the corner to see what is causing all the commotion.
And then he sees it.
It's a possum. Hanging by its nuts!
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! The theory is it climbed up the fence to get over it and on his way down, his testicles got caught between the fence boards rendering him useless. He couldn't climb up or down and was stuck!
Jim put a glove on was going to try and figure out how to release him but the possum being in pain kept trying to bite and claw at him. So he called Animal Control who came out with one of those sticks with a rope on the end and was able to get the possum off the fence. Supposedly, Animal Control took the possum to a Vet to have him looked over and then they will release him back "to the wild".
That possum won't be able to show his face around his buddies anymore though.
"Hey man, where were you yesterday? You didn't come hang out like normal."
"I don't want to talk about it..." he replied in a higher pitched voice with his head (and nuts) hung in shame.
Ouch!
