Maintaining focus?

[mwlabel]

First, my story (the less important part):

Blood. Sweat. Tears.

Blood, sweat, and tears.


Blood:
I'm sacrificing my body for this. My right index finger is now heavily scarred due to crushing it with a wrench accidentally, but then intentionally not letting it heal because it interrupted my training schedule. I've gashed my hands countless times... digging them into sharp corners of a sight, pinching them during a load, and other miscellaneous nonsense. I have several meetings with trainers in the upcoming weeks on how to prevent severe elbow tendonitis. If there isn't a way, I will continue on regardless.

Sweat:
Every day. There is no off day. It might be cooking in the summer sun or working hard in a winter coat, or numerous hours indoors - pushing too hard for the A/C to keep the body cool.

Tears:
Mental break downs on the range. Weeks of hard work not adding up to the numbers I hoped for and expected. Frustrated to the point of barely breathing.
Sacrificing a social life because I'd rather train than go to the bars after work. Gone all day on the weekends either at the range, or driving numerous hours to pick up cases of ammo.


I'm hungry. I'm pissed off. I want this so badly that I can feel my soul shake. On game day, I show up ONLY with intentions of hunting and murdering IPSC targets, and to do it faster and better than my competitors.


(Important part)
But, I can't do it anymore...

I've lost focus. Almost entirely. I can't seem to motivate myself any longer. There's no gas left in the tank.
Many people have told me to take a couple days off. I did. Upon my return, it was no better. The fog created by lack of focus/motivation is still there.

I tell myself I need a nemesis. I'm fueled by competition. I need somebody to compete head-to-head with frequently. Somebody who pushes me to work harder and perform better. But I don't have that. I can't even use competitions as my "nemesis" as I'm lucky if I can shoot one per month.

It's also not what I need. It's what I want.

What I need is to focus, to find a way to motivate myself.

How do you maintain a strong mental focus when what you are working towards is so far away? Whatever your goal is. It can be a victory of any kind: promotion at work, overcoming an addiction, anything.
When you know that the opportunity is so far down the road, how do you stay focused on something that far ahead?


It's like school: we coast by until we know a test is coming up, then we kick it into high gear and do the hard work. But, that won't work here. What I want to accomplish requires pushing myself to Mach 1 every day of the week. I'm not doing that. I can feel myself slowly letting go - and I know it's because I'm losing focus. Training sessions are becoming shorter, and particularly important range days are becoming spaced further apart.

So I ask my brothers, what do you do to maintain focus? Especially for something you know you won't see any large benefits for in the near future?
How do you keep the energy and metaphorical fire at a substantial level?

 

[CATom]

I hear you man. Anything worth doing is worth doing well. At the same time you need a hobby from your hobby. Like a career you'll burn yourself out and stunt your growth without breaks. It's very counterintuitive to not take a step back and look at the big picture. It just might be at one of those bars you figure out your hiccup, when your thinking about something else.

 

[D Quintero]

two words - Cognitive Enhancers

 

[The EVP]

Ever since my near death experience in February, I remind myself that each day is a gift and to make the most of it. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. When I don't, I know that a new day is just around the corner and as long as I wake up, everything is good. For me, my goal is to live healthier, lose weight and take better care of myself. I WILL achieve this.

I don't know what your goal is, but whatever it may be the only people that will tell you that you can't achieve it are people that never achieved theirs.

Forget regret or life is yours to lose....

 

[bugbear]

I hear you man. Anything worth doing is worth doing well. At the same time you need a hobby from your hobby. Like a career you'll burn yourself out and stunt your growth without breaks. It's very counterintuitive to not take a step back and look at the big picture. It just might be at one of those bars you figure out your hiccup, when your thinking about something else.

Amen

As a former trainer , u need to give your body and mind a rest. Doesn't matter what the goal is but this holds true. U will come back better after taking some time off. Trust me bro

 

[mcroom]

Amen an what Tim and Tom have said and the longer you wait to take that time off the longer it will take for you to regain that vigar you so desire. If you completely burn out, it could take a year off before your mentally able to get back at it. Why do you think God made the world in 6 days and rested on the seventh? I will be praying for you brother.

 

[zama80]

Alex, it sounds like over training, over thinking, and a touch of obsessive behavior for good touch. When I was a much younger man I shot competition skeet. I shot practice rounds every Saturday and Sunday, and spent the days in between re-loading shells and cleaning and maintaining my shotguns and basically thinking and talking about skeet shooting all the time. One day on the range, out nowhere, I couldn't hit the station 2 high house bird to save my life. Singles or doubles, I missed that damn bird every time. Over two days, I bet I practiced shooting that station a couple hundred times. I could visualize the correct lead on the bird, always kept the shotgun moving and had good form but I had such a mental stress over this bird that I never fully recovered. And if a dropped a shot during rounds, it was always that bird. The lesson here? I obsessed over one thing, and thus the one thing a wanted to do well eluded me.
Much later in life I learned my key to deal with situations like that. I had to find something else that I could do that kept my mind occupied, and almost always I found either a solution to a technical problem I was having at work, or how to handle a personal situation in my life. For me it was kayak fishing, along with a couple cigars of course. And really for me, the fishing is secondary and helps me from getting bored. After a bad week there is nothing more relaxing then launching right at dawn, lighting a cigar and drift fishing for a couple hours. I have found more solutions to problems that way then I can count. So give it a try. I hear you guys have a lake or two up in Minnesota, with the added advantage of not having gators in them, so give it a try. Put the pistols away for awhile, grab a fishing pole, some cigars and rent or borrow a kayak. I will bet that after a few trips, a new perspective on life, and your problems will form. After you realize that you could live a happy productive life even if you never shoot another competitive round should you consider picking the pistols back up. You are far too young to burn out on anything. And remember, a clam shooter is better than a tense shooter. Me, and that stupid station two high house bird know this all too well.

 

[jmartins]

I'm a born athlete. Yes this sounds a bit odd but ever since I was a little child I had a passion for football it was all I ever wanted. I wanted the video games, I wanted to watch on Sundays/Mondays. When the older bigger kids were playing at school I was going to play.

Now here is what I learned and this may not apply to you brother but think about it cause I believe it applies to all with a goal.

Your biggest nemesis must be yourself. No matter how much your focus breaks you must find a way through the fog. Carry something with you that reminds you of where you are heading toward remember those moments you were beaten. Use those memories that pushed you to the very edge of quitting. That must be your fuel you must use that to push through the fog. Set a goal but don't try attaining that goal, no, you must push to completely destroy that goal you want to shoot a round in 30 seconds (I don't know if that is a normal time sorry) but you must push and thrive for 15. When your competing you must drive yourself to the point where when someone else is shooting no without a question of a doubt that their one goal the only thing that drives them to continue is beating you. The person watching your shots and keeping your time are just trying to screw you out of a win.

You must dig through hell and back you must destroy everything you believe in and push beyond that.

I know social times suffer I trained for football every single day. 6-8 hours a day without rest I would watch film I would watch NFL games.

Just know this once you are the best rest and social life can be had but also remember once at the top everyone wants you back at the bottom.

"The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will."
Vince Lombardi

 

[YodisMatt]

Lots of great posts in here on this. My advice might not be on point as I am competitive but more so I like to be a jack of all trades, always have wanted to do so many different things and still do.

I to have burnt myself out on things at times and move on but do revisit these hobbies. I am still a car guy, but for many years it was day in day out cars cars cars cars, after a while the meets got old and boring, shows were the same and I needed some change. I went out and discovered others with other interests out there that I could also enjoy, now I kind of spread myself out with different groups of people with different and some similar hobbies. This now has also allowed me to over look the different things each has and what I really want to work on with some.

Don't think its over brother, take some time off and pick something else up and I am sure you'll get the itch again.

 

[ciggy]

Have you considered Ritalin? LMAO Take it easy my friend and try not to take it so seriously. Sometimes pushing yourself so hard can be your biggest foe. Your young and aggressive, I get that, but you need to settle down a bit and remember that what you are doing is supposed to be fun not stressful. Take a longer time out with another hobby, maybe something you have been wanting to try but keep putting off. You can still practice from time to time but getting away from it mentally can help alot too.

 

[mdwest]

Several things in here Alex to take a look at...

First, my story (the less important part):



I'm sacrificing my body for this. My right index finger is now heavily scarred due to crushing it with a wrench accidentally, but then intentionally not letting it heal because it interrupted my training schedule. I've gashed my hands countless times... digging them into sharp corners of a sight, pinching them during a load, and other miscellaneous nonsense. I have several meetings with trainers in the upcoming weeks on how to prevent severe elbow tendonitis. If there isn't a way, I will continue on regardless.

This is a bad move dude.. you train through minor injury/pain.. that makes things more "real"... but not through significant injury.. no professional athelete or professional shooter will tell you this is a good idea.. when you train you need to be completely focused.. if you are distracted you will pick up bad/wrong habits.. you will also train your body to compensate for the injury instead of doing things the "right" way..

brusing a thumb because you had a poor grip, to giving yourself a gash on the hand from a sharp corner on a sight or a slide is a "training aid"... youll learn the "right" way to do things.. and remember the "wrong" way well...

having a trigger finger that got crushed as a result of an accident unrelated to training.. requires healing.. before you get back to squeezing the trigger...

find other things to "practice" in the meantime... drawstrokes.. go for a run (get more fit).. train on off hand shooting.. etc.. but let the finger heal..

same thing with the tendonitis.. there is a way to relieve the pain.. and a way to train around the injury without further inflaming it... find the path.... think outside the box.. the right road to take is not the one that requires you to barrel through the obstacle.. go over it, under it, around it, etc.. instead...

Sweat:
Every day. There is no off day. It might be cooking in the summer sun or working hard in a winter coat, or numerous hours indoors - pushing too hard for the A/C to keep the body cool.

you should train in extreme conditions.. but not every day.. and not regularly....

you need to range day in the rain.. or the extreme heat.. or the extreme cold.. occasionally.. you need to know what it is like to work with your equipment in those conditions.. see what is going to work.. what is going to fail.. etc.. and find out how your body adapts as well... but that doesnt mean you dont take care of yourself in the process.. lots of water when its hot... plenty of thermal protection when its cold.. rain gear when its wet.. etc..etc..

and you shouldnt be training 7x days a week... pro atheletes take days off.. every week.... tier 1 special operations guys take time off every week when in training cycle.. the body needs time to heal... so does the mind... you need to give your brain and your body a chance to hit the reset button and just relax...

when you head back to the gym/range/whatever with a refeshed, well rested, and refocused body and mind.. your training experience and the quality of the training you do will improve...

when you head to the gym/range/whatever physically and mentally exhausted.. you are essentially bringing a dull blade to the knife fight.. you are at a disadvantage from the start... your training will suffer as will your over all experience.. your retention will suffer as well...

Tears:
Mental break downs on the range. Weeks of hard work not adding up to the numbers I hoped for and expected. Frustrated to the point of barely breathing.
Sacrificing a social life because I'd rather train than go to the bars after work. Gone all day on the weekends either at the range, or driving numerous hours to pick up cases of ammo.

see above...

we all need a break.. we all need a chance to "reset".. thats part of being human.. if you work hard.. you need to play hard.. as well as rest hard.. its all about balance.. learn to be as focused and intent about everything you do.. and your training will improve.. you dont find ISPC Grand Masters that are "laid back" people... they are hyper focused about EVERYTHING they do.. you dont get to that level without being a supercharged kinda guy.. but they do have balance in their lives (the balancing point is different for everyone... some people can work more.. some need to play more.. some need to rest more.. etc..)..

if you want to improve your shooting and other self defense skills.. you need to be spending a good bit of focused time on the range, on the mats, in the gym, etc..

but after a couple of hours.. you need to be heading to the bar with your gym/shooting buddy.. having a couple of brews, smoking a nice stick.. and relaxing... debrief the day at the bar over a beer.. laugh about your mistakes.. figure out how to fix them while sitting on the back patio smoking a stick and watching the grass grow.. go get laid... then in the morning repeat the process..

some of the best "SWAT" training I ever did was at "chior practice".. where we all figured out the ways of the world.. and how to solve all of lifes problems.. over a couple of beers and a couple of slices of pizza... then went to the range the next day to figure out if our solutions were going to work or not..

I'm hungry. I'm pissed off. I want this so badly that I can feel my soul shake. On game day, I show up ONLY with intentions of hunting and murdering IPSC targets, and to do it faster and better than my competitors.

slow is smooth....

smooth is fast...

dont focus on how fast you can do anything..

focus on how correctly and smoothly you can do things..

no mistakes = faster times...

smooth edges = faster times...

practice without mistakes and smooth edges = even faster times..

focus on absolutely doing it absolutely right.. every single time you squeeze the trigger..

youre going to slow down a little bit at first...

but then youre going to see your times improve.. substantially... and get better and better and better.. until you top out on your personal ability..

(Important part)
But, I can't do it anymore...

I've lost focus. Almost entirely. I can't seem to motivate myself any longer. There's no gas left in the tank.
Many people have told me to take a couple days off. I did. Upon my return, it was no better. The fog created by lack of focus/motivation is still there.

I tell myself I need a nemesis. I'm fueled by competition. I need somebody to compete head-to-head with frequently. Somebody who pushes me to work harder and perform better. But I don't have that. I can't even use competitions as my "nemesis" as I'm lucky if I can shoot one per month.

It's also not what I need. It's what I want.

What I need is to focus, to find a way to motivate myself.

How do you maintain a strong mental focus when what you are working towards is so far away? Whatever your goal is. It can be a victory of any kind: promotion at work, overcoming an addiction, anything.
When you know that the opportunity is so far down the road, how do you stay focused on something that far ahead?


It's like school: we coast by until we know a test is coming up, then we kick it into high gear and do the hard work. But, that won't work here. What I want to accomplish requires pushing myself to Mach 1 every day of the week. I'm not doing that. I can feel myself slowly letting go - and I know it's because I'm losing focus. Training sessions are becoming shorter, and particularly important range days are becoming spaced further apart.

So I ask my brothers, what do you do to maintain focus? Especially for something you know you won't see any large benefits for in the near future?
How do you keep the energy and metaphorical fire at a substantial level?

I think zama hit the nail on the head earlier..

youre likely over training..

you need less time on the range, on the mats, at the gym... so the quality of that time can improve...

Im not sure what the standard is today... but back in the 2002-2003 time frame the MAX number of rounds recommended by the FBI to shoot in a day was 500 (this included range time with automatic weapons).. the target was actually around 400 rounds when training tactical teams, firarms instructors, etc.. for the average dude on the street the target was around 250 rounds (remember these round counts are MAX)... anything beyond that and people start loosing focus.. their hands are cramping, their palms are sore.. and frankly, they have been on the range too long.. theyre thinking about whats for dinner tonight.. trying to remember if they have errands to run after work.. thinking about the text message their girlfriend sent during lunch.. etc..etc.... when that happens.. its time to pack it in for the day.. the moment you realize your brain is anywhere in the world other than the target downrange.. you arent getting much value out of training..

Im not saying to stop training.. Im saying its time to move onto something else for a little while (maybe its time for that beer... or to go on a 2 mile run.. or go shopping for a new holster.. whatever.. just take a breather and get refocused)...


One of the things I used to do.. that worked very well for me when I was training very hard... was to set up "house rules"... that allowed me to get training in very small little bits.. but essentially had me training all the time...

every time I walked through a doorway in my home.. I owed myself 10x pushups (you begin to realize that getting up off the couch just to go take a pee requires you to walk through a lot more doorways than you originally thought)...

every time I sat down to watch TV... I owed myself sit ups through all commercial breaks..

every time I strapped a pistol on, I did 10x perfect drawstrokes... every time I got ready to take the pistol off it was 10x perfect drawstrokes with a dry fire...

etc..etc...

none of these things took more than a minute or two... some of them only took a matter of seconds..

but I was getting very focused, small bits of training, all day, every day.. all the time....

in a matter of just a couple of months I had a lightning fast, picture perfect, draw... but never really spent a whole lot of time at the range working on it (did plenty of drawstroke training as part of my daily life)..

So then I moved the requirement to reload drills.. etc..etc...

My wife thought I was nuts at the time...

but I was a master class IDPA and B class ISPC shooter back then (I did a whole lot more IDPA than I did ISPC).. and rarely went to the range more than 2x times a week.. for more than a couple of hours at a time....

the rest of my "training" time was done in very small bits.. or was focused on skills where training was conducted off the range..

 

[strife]

Several things in here Alex to take a look at...

First, my story (the less important part):



I'm sacrificing my body for this. My right index finger is now heavily scarred due to crushing it with a wrench accidentally, but then intentionally not letting it heal because it interrupted my training schedule. I've gashed my hands countless times... digging them into sharp corners of a sight, pinching them during a load, and other miscellaneous nonsense. I have several meetings with trainers in the upcoming weeks on how to prevent severe elbow tendonitis. If there isn't a way, I will continue on regardless.

This is a bad move dude.. you train through minor injury/pain.. that makes things more "real"... but not through significant injury.. no professional athelete or professional shooter will tell you this is a good idea.. when you train you need to be completely focused.. if you are distracted you will pick up bad/wrong habits.. you will also train your body to compensate for the injury instead of doing things the "right" way..

brusing a thumb because you had a poor grip, to giving yourself a gash on the hand from a sharp corner on a sight or a slide is a "training aid"... youll learn the "right" way to do things.. and remember the "wrong" way well...

having a trigger finger that got crushed as a result of an accident unrelated to training.. requires healing.. before you get back to squeezing the trigger...

find other things to "practice" in the meantime... drawstrokes.. go for a run (get more fit).. train on off hand shooting.. etc.. but let the finger heal..

same thing with the tendonitis.. there is a way to relieve the pain.. and a way to train around the injury without further inflaming it... find the path.... think outside the box.. the right road to take is not the one that requires you to barrel through the obstacle.. go over it, under it, around it, etc.. instead...

Sweat:
Every day. There is no off day. It might be cooking in the summer sun or working hard in a winter coat, or numerous hours indoors - pushing too hard for the A/C to keep the body cool.

you should train in extreme conditions.. but not every day.. and not regularly....

you need to range day in the rain.. or the extreme heat.. or the extreme cold.. occasionally.. you need to know what it is like to work with your equipment in those conditions.. see what is going to work.. what is going to fail.. etc.. and find out how your body adapts as well... but that doesnt mean you dont take care of yourself in the process.. lots of water when its hot... plenty of thermal protection when its cold.. rain gear when its wet.. etc..etc..

and you shouldnt be training 7x days a week... pro atheletes take days off.. every week.... tier 1 special operations guys take time off every week when in training cycle.. the body needs time to heal... so does the mind... you need to give your brain and your body a chance to hit the reset button and just relax...

when you head back to the gym/range/whatever with a refeshed, well rested, and refocused body and mind.. your training experience and the quality of the training you do will improve...

when you head to the gym/range/whatever physically and mentally exhausted.. you are essentially bringing a dull blade to the knife fight.. you are at a disadvantage from the start... your training will suffer as will your over all experience.. your retention will suffer as well...

Tears:
Mental break downs on the range. Weeks of hard work not adding up to the numbers I hoped for and expected. Frustrated to the point of barely breathing.
Sacrificing a social life because I'd rather train than go to the bars after work. Gone all day on the weekends either at the range, or driving numerous hours to pick up cases of ammo.

see above...

we all need a break.. we all need a chance to "reset".. thats part of being human.. if you work hard.. you need to play hard.. as well as rest hard.. its all about balance.. learn to be as focused and intent about everything you do.. and your training will improve.. you dont find ISPC Grand Masters that are "laid back" people... they are hyper focused about EVERYTHING they do.. you dont get to that level without being a supercharged kinda guy.. but they do have balance in their lives (the balancing point is different for everyone... some people can work more.. some need to play more.. some need to rest more.. etc..)..

if you want to improve your shooting and other self defense skills.. you need to be spending a good bit of focused time on the range, on the mats, in the gym, etc..

but after a couple of hours.. you need to be heading to the bar with your gym/shooting buddy.. having a couple of brews, smoking a nice stick.. and relaxing... debrief the day at the bar over a beer.. laugh about your mistakes.. figure out how to fix them while sitting on the back patio smoking a stick and watching the grass grow.. go get laid... then in the morning repeat the process..

some of the best "SWAT" training I ever did was at "chior practice".. where we all figured out the ways of the world.. and how to solve all of lifes problems.. over a couple of beers and a couple of slices of pizza... then went to the range the next day to figure out if our solutions were going to work or not..

I'm hungry. I'm pissed off. I want this so badly that I can feel my soul shake. On game day, I show up ONLY with intentions of hunting and murdering IPSC targets, and to do it faster and better than my competitors.

slow is smooth....

smooth is fast...

dont focus on how fast you can do anything..

focus on how correctly and smoothly you can do things..

no mistakes = faster times...

smooth edges = faster times...

practice without mistakes and smooth edges = even faster times..

focus on absolutely doing it absolutely right.. every single time you squeeze the trigger..

youre going to slow down a little bit at first...

but then youre going to see your times improve.. substantially... and get better and better and better.. until you top out on your personal ability..

(Important part)
But, I can't do it anymore...

I've lost focus. Almost entirely. I can't seem to motivate myself any longer. There's no gas left in the tank.
Many people have told me to take a couple days off. I did. Upon my return, it was no better. The fog created by lack of focus/motivation is still there.

I tell myself I need a nemesis. I'm fueled by competition. I need somebody to compete head-to-head with frequently. Somebody who pushes me to work harder and perform better. But I don't have that. I can't even use competitions as my "nemesis" as I'm lucky if I can shoot one per month.

It's also not what I need. It's what I want.

What I need is to focus, to find a way to motivate myself.

How do you maintain a strong mental focus when what you are working towards is so far away? Whatever your goal is. It can be a victory of any kind: promotion at work, overcoming an addiction, anything.
When you know that the opportunity is so far down the road, how do you stay focused on something that far ahead?


It's like school: we coast by until we know a test is coming up, then we kick it into high gear and do the hard work. But, that won't work here. What I want to accomplish requires pushing myself to Mach 1 every day of the week. I'm not doing that. I can feel myself slowly letting go - and I know it's because I'm losing focus. Training sessions are becoming shorter, and particularly important range days are becoming spaced further apart.

So I ask my brothers, what do you do to maintain focus? Especially for something you know you won't see any large benefits for in the near future?
How do you keep the energy and metaphorical fire at a substantial level?

I think zama hit the nail on the head earlier..

youre likely over training..

you need less time on the range, on the mats, at the gym... so the quality of that time can improve...

Im not sure what the standard is today... but back in the 2002-2003 time frame the MAX number of rounds recommended by the FBI to shoot in a day was 500 (this included range time with automatic weapons).. the target was actually around 400 rounds when training tactical teams, firarms instructors, etc.. for the average dude on the street the target was around 250 rounds (remember these round counts are MAX)... anything beyond that and people start loosing focus.. their hands are cramping, their palms are sore.. and frankly, they have been on the range too long.. theyre thinking about whats for dinner tonight.. trying to remember if they have errands to run after work.. thinking about the text message their girlfriend sent during lunch.. etc..etc.... when that happens.. its time to pack it in for the day.. the moment you realize your brain is anywhere in the world other than the target downrange.. you arent getting much value out of training..

Im not saying to stop training.. Im saying its time to move onto something else for a little while (maybe its time for that beer... or to go on a 2 mile run.. or go shopping for a new holster.. whatever.. just take a breather and get refocused)...


One of the things I used to do.. that worked very well for me when I was training very hard... was to set up "house rules"... that allowed me to get training in very small little bits.. but essentially had me training all the time...

every time I walked through a doorway in my home.. I owed myself 10x pushups (you begin to realize that getting up off the couch just to go take a pee requires you to walk through a lot more doorways than you originally thought)...

every time I sat down to watch TV... I owed myself sit ups through all commercial breaks..

every time I strapped a pistol on, I did 10x perfect drawstrokes... every time I got ready to take the pistol off it was 10x perfect drawstrokes with a dry fire...

etc..etc...

none of these things took more than a minute or two... some of them only took a matter of seconds..

but I was getting very focused, small bits of training, all day, every day.. all the time....

in a matter of just a couple of months I had a lightning fast, picture perfect, draw... but never really spent a whole lot of time at the range working on it (did plenty of drawstroke training as part of my daily life)..

So then I moved the requirement to reload drills.. etc..etc...

My wife thought I was nuts at the time...

but I was a master class IDPA and B class ISPC shooter back then (I did a whole lot more IDPA than I did ISPC).. and rarely went to the range more than 2x times a week.. for more than a couple of hours at a time....

the rest of my "training" time was done in very small bits.. or was focused on skills where training was conducted off the range..

Agreed, I was going to post the same exact thing, word for word. :innocent:

 

[Mediumrarechicken]

Take a week off, your shooting skills won't suffer. Go camping but not at a regular camp ground go out into the woods take a close friend or 2. You need to slow down, your body is telling you things. Learn ways to relax deeply like metation, your mind is taking over. One day you are going to wake up and say I'm done shooting screw this shit, you will stop, then In a few years regret it. Slow down and enjoy it, may e you are at you max level right now no one is perfect.

 

[jwintosh]

Slowdown. Breathe. Gain your balance. Prayers for you.