Quotes I Like, Whats Your?

[N8NOE]

"Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar."
-- Mark Twain

"If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go."
-- Mark Twain

"I smoke in moderation. Only one cigar at a time."
-- Mark Twain

"What is the difference between a $10 and a $2 cigar? Eight bucks."
-- Lew Rothman

"After a truly good meal, an outstanding cigar is still the most satisfying after-dinner activity that doesn't involve two human beings."
-- Brad Shaw, Radio Announcer

"Pull out a Montecristo at a dinner party and the political liberal turns into the nicotine facist."
-- Martyn Harris, British journalist, Daily Telegraph 1/20/89


:bottle:

 

[tedski]

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
-- Albert Einstein

The reason they call if 'golf' is that all the other 4 letter words were used up.
-- Leslie Nielsen

I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
-- Woody Allen

The future ain't what it used to be.
-- Yogi Berra

A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
-- Bill Cosby

Ever notice how it's a penny for your thoughts, yet you put in your two-cents worth? Someone is making a penny on the deal ...
-- Stephen Wright

 

[Wasch_24]

Good ones Ted.

Very insightful. :rofl:

 

[Greg]

For every winner, there are dozens of losers. Odds are you're one of them.

There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots.

Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people.

Until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore, you will not know the terror of being forever lost at sea.

It takes 43 muscles to frown and 17 to smile, but it doesn't take any to just sit there with a dumb look on your face.

It's difficult to comprehend how insane some people can be. Especially when you're insane.

It hurts to admit when you make mistakes - but when they're big enough, the pain only lasts a second.

 

[vperlman]

We don't need red hot pokers --- Hell is other people. Jean-Paul Sartre

 

[Havanaaddict]

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.Jules (Pulp Fiction)

 

[AZsteelman]

Don't fuck with me today, I may have to smack the shit out of you...

- AZsteelman - today after a stupid ass conference call!

 

[tedski]

:rofl:

 

[djs134]

"Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege."

Unknown

 

[djs134]

oh, and...

"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped."
Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)

 

[jwintosh]

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

He who dies with the most toys is dead. You don't see a hearst towing a u-haul.

My name is Jeff. If you're calling me Deputy Winton, I'm probably reading you your rights!

Do you have anything in your pockets that's going to poke me, prod me, prick me, or piss me off?

Opportunity knocks but once....Temptation leans on the door bell.

ice cream is good for the soul!

 

[Wasch_24]

I saw a good one on a truck here in "Nebraska, The good life" today...


"Guns kill people just like spoons made Rosie O'Donnell fat."

 

[caudio51]

Top for the quotes

 

[ATCDub]

One foot in the past and one in the future leaves you in perfect position to shit on today -- Black Dog circa 1986

 

[Boppa-Wasch]

There's no way of knowing how much is showing until you've seen it all. Then you cover it up the way it was and find there's none at all!

Unknown

 

[caudio51]

One foot in the past and one in the future leaves you in perfect position to shit on today -- Black Dog circa 1986

Nice quote Brian