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So I Got Pull Over Last Night

caudio51

BoM Nov '05; Mar '06
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So last night around 10:00 pm I was driving home from my softball game. It’s about a 15 minute drive through some dimly light back roads. I see a quick flash in my headlights of something small bolting into the road - FUMP. I hope that was only a squirrel because if it was a skunk, that will stink in more ways than one.

A couple more miles down the road, I see the flashing blues in my rear view mirror. Ahh, sh!t. I pull over, and the cop comes up to the car, “License and registration please.”

I hand it over and he walks back the cruiser to, I guess, run my plates and stuff. Then he comes back to my window and asks “Do you know why I pulled you over?”

“No, I wasn’t speeding. Do I have a tail light out or something?”

“No,” he says, “Did you realize you hit a cat back there?”

“Nope, I thought it was a squirrel or a skunk or something.” (I’m thinking to myself, and your point is?)

“We’ll in NJ if you hit a domesticated animal, it is the driver’s duty to attempt to find the owner and report it” he tells me. (you got to be sh—ting me). “I won’t ticket you as long as you go back and make an attempt to find the owner of the cat.” No f-ing way, this really ain’t happening. I’m originally from PA and if you hit a cat, you hit a cat.

So I do a U-turn and drive back to the carcass with the cop on my tail. I pick the thing up off the road and start going door to door to try to find the owner with the cop behind me about 10 paces. Let me tell you, people are none too thrilled to have a stranger ringing their doorbell at 10:00 at night holding a dead cat.

I get to about the 4th door and before I can say anything this little old lady in her nightie screams and starts crying (guess I found the owner). I apologize and try to explain the situation to her but she just crying and crying…. What the hell do I do now? I look at the cop and he just kinda shrugs.

This is where it really gets trippy. I’m an animal lover with two cats and a dog at home so I feel for the lady. Not really knowing what to say or do, I reach into my pocket and pull out any money I had, around $28 and hand it to the lady. “I’m really sorry, I don’t know what to do but this is all I have with me, please take it.”

No sooner does she take the money from me, the cop shoves me out of the way, cuffs the lady and starts hauling her to the cruiser. “What’s going on here?” I ask the cop.

The cop says to me “You only hit a cat, I’m taking this lady in for selling pussy.”
 

N2Advnture

Loyal to a fault...
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I am going to pummel you for making me read all of that!

The worst part is that I have heard that about 1 billion times and I was too dopey to even realize it! LOL!
 

Bsslack

So-Cal/Riverside
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SO-CAL, So Far, So Far!
OK Add Me to the list!

The Title got me. The most recent time that I've been pulled over(10+ years) I was taken at Gun Point in a Full Felony Stop. All because I tried to Help a DV Victim.

Yours had a better Ending than Mine, They eventually let Us Go, but not after a Thousand People drove by Who saw me Spread Eagle on my Vehicle, with Multiple cops and cars. I was not a Happy camper. No good deed goes unpunished.

So, Ya punked me too.

Ya gotta laugh!:)



Slack
 

icehog3

Outlaw Hockey Biker
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Man, I wish the cop had tried to pull that chit with me man....woulda been the last thing he did that day, I guaran-fing-tee you!!
 

Poni

BoM Oct 05
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Shit as i was reading it i was telling my wife and father the story. Until i got to the end and had to explain it was a joke. :closedmou
 
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