Luckysaturn13 s Dog Rocket Reviews!
- Thread starter luckysaturn13
- Start date
herfdog
I am no rocket surgeon
The main reason I accepted this position was to get rid of ... erm ... share some dog rockets.Typically, CEO (previously, mutiuseless, luckysaturn,) launches and closes.
DRP goes back to #1, in this case, you. You may need to open a dog pound.
There should not be more sticks on the way back than the way out. That's totally uncalled for and unnecessary.
I recall you, Eran, Jamie, and myself at the start of 2018 DRP and discussing your possible nomination to CEO.
I mentioned this requires the box to go into Canada , out of Canada, and eventually back into Canada.
You said there would be no issues with this and you were granted CEO. No issues means no tissues.
Hey man, it's good to be King !!
Sounds like herfdog is requesting to be bombed another humidor to keep the extras in.
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herfdog
I am no rocket surgeon
Roulette time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Going to be wordy @Opie. Skip to the end for the verdict)
B3 is my lucky pick. Let's see what it gets me:
Hard to tell from the pic, but this one looks a little rough. Didn't notice when I grabbed it, but it's also pre-punched. This cheers me up considerably, since not only does it save me the effort of cutting it, I'm pretty sure it means it's really fancy. Only the best cigars would be pre-punched. Must be Cuban. Probably pre-embargo. I do a quick check for plume, but nothing is there. Must have brushed off while in the bag.
Cold draw is uninspiring. A little tobacco, a little cedar; Not much else. Well, I'm sure it will taste good.
Without further ado, I light it up and see if I can earn that coveted golden poop emoji.
Right off the bat, I'm getting some spice. Some vegetal notes as well. Sort of like lettuce. And maybe tomato?? Also something else
Something like cheese.
And maybe Chicken.
Fried chicken.
This is wonderful!
Oh. yeah. Just had some Naked chicken tacos (@bwhite220 )
So my first impressions of the cigar may be a little off since I just ate.
I press on and the taco recedes into the background. It doesn't go away without a fight, but the cigar does a pretty good job of bludgeoning and beating it down, so soon the taco is a memory and I get into the experience. The first real "notes" I'm picking up are burning paper and something else I can't figure out. The paper taste reminds me of when I was a kid and me and my dumb friends would "roll" our own cigarettes using dried-up weeds and paper. We didn't inhale, but the taste is still with me. Hot smoke, burning paper, and weeds. Thanks @Bondo 440 , you're a real pal!
The ash is really flaky. It more or less stays on, but little bits of it are floating around getting all over me. Like a true genius I've worn a white t-shirt that is quickly becoming covered in cigar ash. Its hot, I'm sweating, shirt looks like I smoked a carton of Winstons. Gonna grab a 40 of malt liquor and my banjo, and we'll get those neighbors talking a little.
Putting aside my aspirations of hill-billy grandeur, I realize the burning paper note has gracefully evolved into a more sophisticated smoldering cardboard. My mouth is getting drier, and being the lazy bum that I am don't bother to get up and get something to drink.
Forgot to show you the pre-punched end.
Just so you know, if you grasp the shaft firmly and stick your tongue in the little hole, the ash grows bigger and curves up at the tip.
Not saying some of you guys didn't already know that, but just wanted to get it out there in case anyone was wondering.
Anyway... The scorched cardboard has picked up a cedar note, as well as some toast, or "toasty" flavors. Really. The best way I can describe it at this point is to light a box of Wheaties on fire, pull some of the smoke into your mouth, and then go lick the inside of an old unused humidor lid.
In just 20 minutes it's changed from burning paper to smoldering cardboard to flaming cereal boxes and musty humidor. Now I know what the experts mean when they talk about a cigar that is "complex". Good times.
My butt is getting sweatier as my mouth continues to get drier. I assume there is a connection of some sort, but choose not to dwell on it, as I don't want to miss a minute of this wonderful cigar. Your're going to say I'm making it up, but the taste I couldn't identify earlier has finally resolved itself: Cigarette filter. Those of you that have ever smoked cigarettes have, at some time or another, for some reason or another, tasted a cigarette filter. It's so obvious now, that I start squinting at the end of this thing, trying to see if it's some sort of filtered cigar; Smoke's getting in my eyes, ash is falling on my shirt, my butt is sweating, and I'm eyeballing the end of this cigar like Adriana Lima is undressing inside that sucker.
Nothing.
No filter.
No Adriana either, but I didn't really expect her to be in there, when she would be much more comfortable waiting for me upstairs.
I know I keep whining about having a dry mouth, but just so you understand the magnitude, I decided to take a selfie. 40 minutes of sucking on the flaming cardboard tube from hell, and this is the result.
Just kidding. That's bob the Happy Javelina. (He keeps me company when the elves are quiet). You may ask why he's happy? Well because he hangs out and smokes cigars every night, that's why. He did not enjoy this particular cigar, however, and gave it back pretty quick. Great, I've pissed off the Javelina with a flaming wad of cardboard. I'll pay for this later, I'm sure.
So getting into the final third, and this thing is a nightmare. The taste has transitioned from burning paper to Flaming Wheaties (and I don't mean the box with Bruce Jenner on it), the retro has gone from mild, to unpleasant, to "WHAT THE HELL?", and I look like I set up camp down wind from Mt St. Helen's.
I'm going to go ahead and call this one a rocket. If it's a hidden gem, it was hidden well enough that it fooled the $#@!# out of me.
What say you, o' keeper of the key? What was this fabulous little guy?
B3 is my lucky pick. Let's see what it gets me:
Hard to tell from the pic, but this one looks a little rough. Didn't notice when I grabbed it, but it's also pre-punched. This cheers me up considerably, since not only does it save me the effort of cutting it, I'm pretty sure it means it's really fancy. Only the best cigars would be pre-punched. Must be Cuban. Probably pre-embargo. I do a quick check for plume, but nothing is there. Must have brushed off while in the bag.
Cold draw is uninspiring. A little tobacco, a little cedar; Not much else. Well, I'm sure it will taste good.
Without further ado, I light it up and see if I can earn that coveted golden poop emoji.
Right off the bat, I'm getting some spice. Some vegetal notes as well. Sort of like lettuce. And maybe tomato?? Also something else
Something like cheese.
And maybe Chicken.
Fried chicken.
This is wonderful!
Oh. yeah. Just had some Naked chicken tacos (@bwhite220 )
So my first impressions of the cigar may be a little off since I just ate.
I press on and the taco recedes into the background. It doesn't go away without a fight, but the cigar does a pretty good job of bludgeoning and beating it down, so soon the taco is a memory and I get into the experience. The first real "notes" I'm picking up are burning paper and something else I can't figure out. The paper taste reminds me of when I was a kid and me and my dumb friends would "roll" our own cigarettes using dried-up weeds and paper. We didn't inhale, but the taste is still with me. Hot smoke, burning paper, and weeds. Thanks @Bondo 440 , you're a real pal!
The ash is really flaky. It more or less stays on, but little bits of it are floating around getting all over me. Like a true genius I've worn a white t-shirt that is quickly becoming covered in cigar ash. Its hot, I'm sweating, shirt looks like I smoked a carton of Winstons. Gonna grab a 40 of malt liquor and my banjo, and we'll get those neighbors talking a little.
Putting aside my aspirations of hill-billy grandeur, I realize the burning paper note has gracefully evolved into a more sophisticated smoldering cardboard. My mouth is getting drier, and being the lazy bum that I am don't bother to get up and get something to drink.
Forgot to show you the pre-punched end.
Just so you know, if you grasp the shaft firmly and stick your tongue in the little hole, the ash grows bigger and curves up at the tip.
Not saying some of you guys didn't already know that, but just wanted to get it out there in case anyone was wondering.
Anyway... The scorched cardboard has picked up a cedar note, as well as some toast, or "toasty" flavors. Really. The best way I can describe it at this point is to light a box of Wheaties on fire, pull some of the smoke into your mouth, and then go lick the inside of an old unused humidor lid.
In just 20 minutes it's changed from burning paper to smoldering cardboard to flaming cereal boxes and musty humidor. Now I know what the experts mean when they talk about a cigar that is "complex". Good times.
My butt is getting sweatier as my mouth continues to get drier. I assume there is a connection of some sort, but choose not to dwell on it, as I don't want to miss a minute of this wonderful cigar. Your're going to say I'm making it up, but the taste I couldn't identify earlier has finally resolved itself: Cigarette filter. Those of you that have ever smoked cigarettes have, at some time or another, for some reason or another, tasted a cigarette filter. It's so obvious now, that I start squinting at the end of this thing, trying to see if it's some sort of filtered cigar; Smoke's getting in my eyes, ash is falling on my shirt, my butt is sweating, and I'm eyeballing the end of this cigar like Adriana Lima is undressing inside that sucker.
Nothing.
No filter.
No Adriana either, but I didn't really expect her to be in there, when she would be much more comfortable waiting for me upstairs.
I know I keep whining about having a dry mouth, but just so you understand the magnitude, I decided to take a selfie. 40 minutes of sucking on the flaming cardboard tube from hell, and this is the result.
Just kidding. That's bob the Happy Javelina. (He keeps me company when the elves are quiet
). You may ask why he's happy? Well because he hangs out and smokes cigars every night, that's why. He did not enjoy this particular cigar, however, and gave it back pretty quick. Great, I've pissed off the Javelina with a flaming wad of cardboard. I'll pay for this later, I'm sure.So getting into the final third, and this thing is a nightmare. The taste has transitioned from burning paper to Flaming Wheaties (and I don't mean the box with Bruce Jenner on it), the retro has gone from mild, to unpleasant, to "WHAT THE HELL?", and I look like I set up camp down wind from Mt St. Helen's.
I'm going to go ahead and call this one a rocket. If it's a hidden gem, it was hidden well enough that it fooled the $#@!# out of me.
What say you, o' keeper of the key? What was this fabulous little guy?
I have to follow this? WTF?!?.
Like trying to have sex with Marilyn Chambers after John Holmes has had his way with her.
I am going to have to buy some vowels.
Like trying to have sex with Marilyn Chambers after John Holmes has had his way with her.
I am going to have to buy some vowels.
LOL ! Great Writeup , Harlan !!
And you have just smoked an "Elephant Butt" cigar.Really. These things exist ! Good job ! I'll update your DRP contestant stats tonight.
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First Ape smokes a Donkey, now an elephant butt? I’m noticing a trend here. Some interspecies mingling going on here.LOL ! Great Writeup , Harlan !!
Really. These things exist ! Good job ! I'll update your DRP contestant stats tonight.
Looks like Harlan should be the AssMan! LolFirst Ape smokes a Donkey, now an elephant butt? I’m noticing a trend here. Some interspecies mingling going on here.
Yep. For real. Not tampered with in any way. Picked up specifically for packing in the DRP pass. Legit, fresh, and for sale at a B&M / Puff-style smoke shop, the next town over.Yes. I echo this sentiment. What the hell?
Elephant butt?
Which one was better? The Elephant butt or that Smoking Donkey Ass?
irratebass
www.blindmanspuff.com
I'm at work reading this, and these 2 statements almost made me lol at a customer on the phone, I had to take a breathe and just have a smile on my face while answering the phone. Amazing job Apes!