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Sobriety Thread

GVH

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Funny - I thought about trying to organize an AA herf in my local community - then found this thread. After 9+ years I think a cigar-based meeting would be fun - even if not an official meeting.
 

ChefBoyRG54

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Been sober and clean (other substances than alcohol are a major part of my story) since the age of 19; May 16, 2008. Not as active as I used to be in recovery, but still sponsor guys, go to meetings, etc...

Would love to be added on the list!
Nicely done sir :) been clean since I was 23!
 

Ducttapegonewild

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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
 
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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
only one who can get your friend sober is him. there is hope for you it's called al-anon http://texas-al-anon.org/
 
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Been sober and clean (other substances than alcohol are a major part of my story) since the age of 19; May 16, 2008. Not as active as I used to be in recovery, but still sponsor guys, go to meetings, etc...

Would love to be added on the list!
Nicely done sir :) been clean since I was 23!
That's awesome, Ryan! It's funny, I wondered if you were recovering; I saw all the tea drinking, as well as the just for today you posted on my quitting smoking cigarettes thread.

Keep coming back, my friend :)
 
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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
only one who can get your friend sober is him. there is hope for you it's called al-anon http://texas-al-anon.org/
^^^Very sound advice right there.
 
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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
Having an ex wife (been long ago) that was an alcoholic I myself attened al-anon meetings.
First things first and you will hear the same from any al-anon meeting is to stop trying to change an alcoholic. They have to want the change and as much as I know you think you are doing your friend a favor by bailing him out repeatedly your are actually making it worse. This is whats known as enabling. If you are there to pick him up every time he hits the ground you have become the responsibility that should be his and simply make it easier for him to get drunk. My suggestion is tough love. Most of the time it takes hitting bottom to get the wake up call. Besides that, once you are down on your knees you are in the perfect position to pray.
Dont take him anywhere, dont bail him out of jail, dont take up his slack, let him walk home from the bar he gets thrown out of. The more you turn your back the let him pay for his own mistakes the better friend you will be for it.
 

Ducttapegonewild

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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
Having an ex wife (been long ago) that was an alcoholic I myself attened al-anon meetings.
First things first and you will hear the same from any al-anon meeting is to stop trying to change an alcoholic. They have to want the change and as much as I know you think you are doing your friend a favor by bailing him out repeatedly your are actually making it worse. This is whats known as enabling. If you are there to pick him up every time he hits the ground you have become the responsibility that should be his and simply make it easier for him to get drunk. My suggestion is tough love. Most of the time it takes hitting bottom to get the wake up call. Besides that, once you are down on your knees you are in the perfect position to pray.
Dont take him anywhere, dont bail him out of jail, dont take up his slack, let him walk home from the bar he gets thrown out of. The more you turn your back the let him pay for his own mistakes the better friend you will be for it.
It's not that simple. My friend, if anything, is a resourceful drunk. If I was the only one doing it, then great, but I'm not. He is well liked at the bars he frequents, and they will take him home, continue serving him his beer, or even call a cab for him. I don't get the 2am calls anymore because I told him I won't answer or pick him up. But someone always does. As for taking him anywhere, that is selfish on my part, going to school full time and working full time, I need to unwind at some point. I enjoy going to the bar and having a beer or two, and if I'm feeling frisky, maybe a third. My friend is the only person I can go with that isn't trying to get a "girlfriend for the night" and since I have known him for so long knows my history so can understand me.

Sounds like I'm making excuses.

Maybe al-anon would be beneficial to me.

Jesus I'm an idiot. (No comment on that Rasshat...)
 
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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
Having an ex wife (been long ago) that was an alcoholic I myself attened al-anon meetings.
First things first and you will hear the same from any al-anon meeting is to stop trying to change an alcoholic. They have to want the change and as much as I know you think you are doing your friend a favor by bailing him out repeatedly your are actually making it worse. This is whats known as enabling. If you are there to pick him up every time he hits the ground you have become the responsibility that should be his and simply make it easier for him to get drunk. My suggestion is tough love. Most of the time it takes hitting bottom to get the wake up call. Besides that, once you are down on your knees you are in the perfect position to pray.
Dont take him anywhere, dont bail him out of jail, dont take up his slack, let him walk home from the bar he gets thrown out of. The more you turn your back the let him pay for his own mistakes the better friend you will be for it.
It's not that simple. My friend, if anything, is a resourceful drunk. If I was the only one doing it, then great, but I'm not. He is well liked at the bars he frequents, and they will take him home, continue serving him his beer, or even call a cab for him. I don't get the 2am calls anymore because I told him I won't answer or pick him up. But someone always does. As for taking him anywhere, that is selfish on my part, going to school full time and working full time, I need to unwind at some point. I enjoy going to the bar and having a beer or two, and if I'm feeling frisky, maybe a third. My friend is the only person I can go with that isn't trying to get a "girlfriend for the night" and since I have known him for so long knows my history so can understand me.

Sounds like I'm making excuses.

Maybe al-anon would be beneficial to me.

Jesus I'm an idiot. (No comment on that Rasshat...)
You are not an idiot brother. I had a father through the 90's and 00's that I made all the same choices as you with. I have a lifelong best friend right now that I struggle about doing right for him. I gave al-anon my honest attention and those difficult decisions about people I care about began to become clearer and easier. At least that has been my experience.
 

CWS

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This thread gives me hope. Not for me, there is none, but for my buddy. I struggle with his addiction consistently. I've offered driving him to meetings, get him a sponsor, whatever it takes to get him sober, but he keeps drinking. I have taken him to rehabs on multiple occasions, I've bailed him out of jail, picked him up several times from bars that he has been thrown out of, all to no avail. His family and I have tried an intervention a time or two. I'm at a loss, I don't know what I can do to get him off the booze. Right now, the only thing I know I can do is to drive him to/from the bar to keep him off the road, I don't like it, but regretfully, if I tell him no on that he will find a way and not associate with me. I don't want to lose the friendship, we've been friends for almost 30 years, he is like a brother to me...
Having an ex wife (been long ago) that was an alcoholic I myself attened al-anon meetings.
First things first and you will hear the same from any al-anon meeting is to stop trying to change an alcoholic. They have to want the change and as much as I know you think you are doing your friend a favor by bailing him out repeatedly your are actually making it worse. This is whats known as enabling. If you are there to pick him up every time he hits the ground you have become the responsibility that should be his and simply make it easier for him to get drunk. My suggestion is tough love. Most of the time it takes hitting bottom to get the wake up call. Besides that, once you are down on your knees you are in the perfect position to pray.
Dont take him anywhere, dont bail him out of jail, dont take up his slack, let him walk home from the bar he gets thrown out of. The more you turn your back the let him pay for his own mistakes the better friend you will be for it.
It's not that simple. My friend, if anything, is a resourceful drunk. If I was the only one doing it, then great, but I'm not. He is well liked at the bars he frequents, and they will take him home, continue serving him his beer, or even call a cab for him. I don't get the 2am calls anymore because I told him I won't answer or pick him up. But someone always does. As for taking him anywhere, that is selfish on my part, going to school full time and working full time, I need to unwind at some point. I enjoy going to the bar and having a beer or two, and if I'm feeling frisky, maybe a third. My friend is the only person I can go with that isn't trying to get a "girlfriend for the night" and since I have known him for so long knows my history so can understand me.

Sounds like I'm making excuses.

Maybe al-anon would be beneficial to me.

Jesus I'm an idiot. (No comment on that Rasshat...)
You are not an idiot. Alanon uses the same principles of AA. You are powerless. Alanon gives you tools to deal with that powerlessness. Alanon will teach you that you are not responsible and you cannot fix him. Alanon will teach you how to deal with those feelings of helplessness. They say a slip in Alanon is five minutes of compassion. That will give you an idea.

AA taught me I had a disease and that I could not deal with it alone. Give Alanon a try.
 
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I have been sober since Feb. 10th, 1991. I haven't attended a meeting for a while, but I learned how to live life in those rooms and am eternally grateful. There is nothing that could happen in my life today that a drink would fix or make better. I still have a bunch of close friends I talk to and keep in touch with on a regular basis which helps keep me honest and a daily inventory has become a way of life. I occasionally get the opportunity to do a 12 step call which reminds me I am only one drink away from a drunk.

I am glad to see there are several AA members here on BOTL, let's me know I am in the right place.
 
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I have been sober since Feb. 10th, 1991. I haven't attended a meeting for a while, but I learned how to live life in those rooms and am eternally grateful. There is nothing that could happen in my life today that a drink would fix or make better. I still have a bunch of close friends I talk to and keep in touch with on a regular basis which helps keep me honest and a daily inventory has become a way of life. I occasionally get the opportunity to do a 12 step call which reminds me I am only one drink away from a drunk.

I am glad to see there are several AA members here on BOTL, let's me know I am in the right place.
Congrats that is a long time.
 
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