I love week day mornings.....here is how they normally go.
4:30 am: The paperboy hits the screen door with the newspaper.
4:31 am: I am wide awake. I contemplate murder.
4:42 am: I fall into a light sleep.
5:30 am: The neighbors dog goes apeshit, barking at the sunrise.
6:00 am: The girlfriend rolls over and hits me on the snout.
6:01 am: My snout hurts, and I am starting the "countown."
6:02 am: "T-minus 13 minutes and counting....."
6:15 am: The GF's cat starts his famous, "Ohe So La Mio!" rendition.
6:16 am: I start throwing dirty socks at the cat.
6:17 am: The cat gets hit with a dirty sweat sock and runs away, laughing.
6:19 am: The GF's Cocker Spaniel gets pissed off that the cat and barks.
6:20 am: The GF's Labrador gets upset by the barking and jumps on the bed.
6:21 am: The labrador tries to get comfortable and steps on my nuts.
6:21:13 am: The labrador gets smacked. Hard.
6:21:14 am: The labrador yelps and steps on "The Girls" Tits.
6:21:15 am: The girl apologizes to the labrador for yelling at her.
6:22 am: I have to get out of bed and let the dogs out.
6:24 am: I have to clean dog hair off of my body.
6:25 am: I consider having a scotch and soda.
6:30 am: I reconsider having a scotch and soda, 'cause I can't sleep.
7:00 am: The alarm clock goes off, and the GF tells me to hit snooze.
7:20 am: The GF wakes up refreshed and alert, ready to take on all things.
7:30 am: I ask the weather gods to send sunshine so I can go to work.
7:40 am: I ask God to smite the neighbors dog.
7:50 am: I ask God if I can smite the neighbors dog, and not get in trouble.
8:00 am: God has once again refused to give me a sign.
9:00 am: The GF heads off to work, cheerfull and well rested.
9:01 am: It starts to rain again. I wonder if I live in Washington state.
9:03 am: The dogs start to whine at the back door.
9:04 am: Sick of the dogs whining, I tell them to get out of the rain.
9:05 am: I wonder why dogs are not under the roof the covers the hot tub.
9:06 am: I wonder if the GF will be upset if I drown the dogs in the hot tub.
9:30 am: The coffe pot starts.
9:31 am: I wish I was working full time, 'cause I would be out of the house at 6:00 am!! and have a nice peacefull morning!@!!!