Headbanger Needs Advise

[Headbanger]

I am mostly a happily married man for the last 12 years. Wife and I have a honest relationship. I want help and honest advise here to keep this marriage. I have been seriously buying cigars really just this year. She know I buy cigars and she know I have some boxes as well at work. What she does not know is that I have a 28 bottle wine cooler which is full and another 55qt cooler almost full as well. Were talking roughly 30+ boxes here. NONE of which I have told her, NONE of which she has asked any questions. I feel bad that I have not told her. Everything is at my work, just far enough away for her to not be able to visit. The credit card bills have been paid from extra money I make from sales bonuses, or sales expenses, or extra money. Recently this credit card bill has not been able to be paid off, but is mostly manageable At the same time I bitch at her for spending $50 bucks at the mall for herself or our child, even if the purchase is necessary.

My dilemma is I want to bring the wine cooler, cooler, and cigars home and not leave them at the office anymore. I would feel better and safer in my home down in the basement. Oh and she and child are going to the beach Monday thru Wednesday while I will be home alone.

So I ask for your opinions and answer the poll if you wish. Not looking for a bashing here. Just ideas and what if situations that I may not have thought of.

Thanks, Steve

 

[Greg]

I would tell the truth. Very plain and very simple. Honor your wife with the truth.

 

[ezrider]

Honesty is always the best advice I can give,,,my wife gets upset with my buying as well, I have a tubador FULL of boxes and such and still I keep buying??
I now try to buy in smaller amounts than before...
i think by telling her and letting you know how you feel, because this is bothering you, that you are hiding something from her, she can see you are sincere...
If by chance she finds out on her own the sh*t may hit the fan....something you both do not want........


Good Luck

 

[geoffrie]

It was nice to have met you Steve.

 

[indyrob]

I'm not one for hiding things from the Mrs., but I will opt for a third choice. I'm sure you already have a humi at home. Take what you need from point A and stick them in point B.

The damage is already done. I think if you were to bring the whole kit & kaboodle home she might wonder what else you've been hiding from her.

 

[CWS]

Uh, Shawn. Everything was going great till the part about bitching about her spending $50.00. Nevertheless. Come clean, wait then bring them home and put them in an out of the way place. They are a tangible investment. My wife though this was a load of shit till I sold a box for what I paid plus shipping. Like money in the bank. Somehow that smoothed things a little. I also bought her two cases of wine for her "cellar". "Have a glass of wine".

 

[Wasch_24]

It was nice to have met you Steve.

:rofl:



You are in a very sticky situation dude.


Better just start bombing people! :rofl:


Unfortunately, if you want to bring them home you are going to have to tell her...good luck with that.


Oh, and this should be a lesson to all of us...Steve is in a very very tough spot of his own doing.

 

[Wasch_24]

Just tell her you are brining your cigars home from the office.


If she happens to notice the huge volume of cigars THEN you are in trouble! :rofl:

 

[Wasch_24]

BTW...do you need your balls any more?




I hope not! :rofl:

 

[Headbanger]

Re balls, I can always go the Todd way (snip snip).

Nice knowing you also Geoffrie, TYVM for the support, your definatly better than a jock strap.

Really, I may just leave them here and let things work themselves out. by me not being open, I have backed myself into a corner for sure.

 

[Greg]

BTW...do you need your balls any more?




I hope not! :rofl:

:rofl:

 

[Quadry]

I am like you in some ways, in that my wife knows I buy cigars and does not ask questions. I do not tell her everything I buy, but on the same token I do not ask her what she buys. I voted for the second choice, because of my do not worry what the other one does. However you might be in some deep doodoo, because you bitch at her for spending a small amount.

Loosen up with her and you should not have to worry about the rest. For now I would stop buying and apologize to her for being tight with her and money. Tell her you will work on changing. Then as it slowly changes, you can bring some of your hidden office stash home. Either that or host a herf at your office for all of us with a grab bag when we leave.

Good luck and keep your head low!

 

[pharmgator]

Buy her something nice before she goes out of town, then bring the cooler, etc home while she is gone. When she gets home tell her about your cooler. Just don't lie to her.

When a man lies, he murders some part of the world.

---Metallica

 

[Headbanger]

NOT what I want to hear, but this is what I need to hear. Thanks for not bashing me here folks. Keep up the comments, I am reading them all and helping me in what to do.

 

[Jwrussell]

Bring it home. Quit bitching about her purchases and make sure everything you've bought is payed off. Preferably in the reverse order that I just wrote that. So long as everything is payed off and your buying isn't causing any financial hard ache then the blow up shouldn't be too big. That being said, you need to put yourself on a major non-buying spree I would imagine.

Everybody's different and everyone handles things different so that's about as far as I can go with my advice. Be prepared for some rough waters though.

 

[joshua]

Could you make room for some wine in the cooler? Maybe t hat will make it a little less... dangerous

 

[Wasch_24]

"Here, have some wine"


:rofl:

 

[DocLogic77]

Well, Steve you are in the deep pooper. There is no away around that unless you decide to keep them at work. If you are to bring them home, she might hold some sort of intervention. That's alot of cigars bro and I doubt she will grasp the concept of why you need so many cigars. She will feel betrayed, and might feel as though you don't care for her if you are willing to lie. If you do bring them home she will most likely insist upon finances becoming an open book for you two. This means spending money for her (no questions asked) and spending money for you (no questions asked). Anything outside of that needs to be discussed and agreed upon.

I have some purchases that I will get in some heat for soon, but I also buy her pretty much anything she wishes without complaint. It's hard for her to give me more than the cold shoulder for an hour or two. If I were cheap with her and pulled this stunt....ohhh buddy...and as many boxes as you have to reveal????? My God be with you.

 

[caudio51]

You're screwed. I would tell her about it certainly. Maybe not bring them all at home at once as the size would piss her off more than just hearing about it.

 

[Brian]

You could just tell her a friend of yours from work just got into cigars, so he ordered a crap load to try the different ones. Unfortunately he doesn't have a humidor yet, so he wants you to store them for him in your basement. Which so happens they fill up your cooler which you have been wanting to bring home anyway.
Then one day when you know she's gonna be home have someone call your home, when she answers have them ask for you. when she says your not home he could tell her that he just wanted to thank you for storing his stash.:thumbsup: