Mr. McSquirelly
Joe Bananas
I'm a fourth generation Yankee fan. Between my great grandfather and me, there have been 27 World Series victories. My grandfather used to get drunk and smoke cigars with Joe Namath and Mickey Mantle in 7th avenue bars. Jesus, it's in my very blood. Whitey Ford, Ironhorse, the Babe, Smokin' Joe, the Goose, Mr. October. C'mon, fellas. The Yanks are as American as apple pie and Marilyn Monroe's pussy. They're bigger than life, bigger than the game itself. They made the Red Sox look like a sorry bunch of sore losers for 86 years. The only thing Red Sox fans could cheer for in 86 years was 2nd and 3rd place, or a chance to lose to the Yanks in the ALCS. Fenway is a dump that should be burned to the ground. C'mon Boston, it's 2015. You had your Goddamn Centenniel. Do like the Yanks, and build a modern replica replete with all the modern amenities. Only a sentimental dope would want to sit in a termite and rat-infested museum for three hours. TEAR IT DOWN, TEAR IT DOWN, TEAR IT DOWN!!!! Let's go Yankees.....Let's go Yankees.....Let's go Yankees.....
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